Someone's Someone

Distinctly. As if it were just last week, I can remember calling up my grandmother for help with recipes. My mother doesn't cook, so I'd call my Mamaw Doe. Before the internet, before I owned five hundred cookbooks, I'd call my Mamaw with the simplest question.

"How much peanut butter do I put in the families chocolate fudge recipe?"

I'm sure I could have probably figured it out. Honestly.

The answer?

"Oh about 3/4 of a cup or so... something like that, you'll be able to tell"

Truthfully, I think the split second idea of just wanting to talk to my grandmother, not to make her feel needed, but for me to feel taken care of maybe. Just knowing I could call and ask a small question, and get some love on the other end of the line. I call my mommy, even though I'm 29 years old, when I don't feel good. I don't really need help, or someone to walk down the block to my house to put a band aid on my finger, but it's incredibly comforting to be babied sometimes.

About an hour ago I was baking peanut butter cookies. While they were baking, I went to change into comfy pajamas and get ready for cookies then bed time. I baked them for my husband, and my sweet friend who's visiting. She was just shocked that out of no where I could "whip up" homemade peanut butter cookies. The dogs were quite excited too since they know they can have peanut butter.
While in our room, getting into pajamas I acknowledged the framed photo smiles of my grandmother and great grandmother on our dresser. I smiled back at them. Then, the phone rang. MY phone. We all have cell phones, not a "home phone." When you have a cell phone it means someone is calling YOU. Not just calling for anyone.
It was my step son. Almost 22 years old. Calling with a question about how exactly I make my sweet tea.
How many tea bags? How much sugar?
I've answered this question twelve times for him in the past.
He also needed to tell me his throat hurt, and that he's taken ibuprofen and allergy medicine. He needed some love and attention.
I will tell you, no matter how much my sweet tea advice, and sympathetic love for him feeling yucky, made him feel a little better, it could never compare to how enormous my heart swelled with joy.
I was someone's help for a simple little question. The person who he actually called "mom," Even though I'm only 8 years older. He's our son. We sent him to Iraq to fight the war. He can tackle anyone in a football game better than some pro's. He could save the world, and I see my husband in him, which makes me love him more. So this man... no longer a boy, found the little boy inside him and called his "Step Mom" just to ask how to make sweet tea.
I was someone's person to call. The person to call when someone just needed someone to give them some love and to know that someone was there.
When I hung up the phone, I looked at the smiling pictures of my grandmother's again. I was more than honored that I could be someone's someone. I still need a someone, but tonight I was someone's mom. Someone's advice giver. Someone to throw some love someone's way.
The smile is still on my face.

*Extra Extra!*
Guess who's stepdaughter needed to know the very next day how I make my chicken and dressing? Same warm fuzzy feelings all over again. I am SOMEONE'S go to person. I mean something... and if it's just for food, thats fine with me. ;)

Quotes

I have a coffee addiction, and if you know me you probably already knew that. Therefor I LOVE cute coffee mugs. In a Hallmark store yesterday I saw adorable mugs with quotes from the Peanuts Gang, and Disney movies, and those great random vintage photo's with quotes about how funny and hard it is to be a woman.
So I decided to pull some up, and maybe, since I'm so picky about the way a coffee mug feels in my hands, I'll just start my own line....


"I've developed a new philosophy . . . I only dread one day at a time."
Peanuts
Charlie Brown

I think I've discovered the secret of life - you just hang around until you get used to it.
Peanuts
Sally Brown

Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, "Why me?", then a voice answers "Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up."
Peanuts
Charlie Brown

Sometimes when I get up in the morning, I feel very peculiar. I feel like I've just got to bite a cat! I feel like if I don't bite a cat before sundown, I'll go crazy! But then I just take a deep breath and forget about it. That's what is known as real maturity.
Peanuts
Snoopy

That's the secret to life . . . replace one worry with another.
Peanuts
Charlie Brown

Try not to have a good time . . . This is supposed to be educational.
Peanuts
Lucy Van Pelt













When a woman ceases to alter the fashion of her hair, you guess that she has passed the crisis of her experience.
Mary Austin

2010

Well its been the "New Year" for almost a month now. I took a trip to Texas on Christmas night. I wore garland around my neck from Christmas morning until midnight when my best friend took me to my Texas house from the airport. See my clients/friends had given me a gift with this cute green garland with little garland stockings on it. It made the perfect scarf. Best Friend didn't believe me really when I called her and told her thats what I'd be wearing. You see I don't really get embarrassed. Ever.

Texas was amazing. I bought A LOT of shirts because shopping is better there and I needed them to match the jewelry I got for Christmas. The food is also way better thats why I now weigh 350 lbs. Thanks mexican food.
I saw soooooo many good friends and laughed the whole time. My daddy rented me the biggest Ford truck you can imagine. I learned to drive in a truck. You wanna talk about a chick who CAN drive a truck????? ME!!!! The only thing I hit was a Target shopping cart. I was NOT one of those people who should not have been in a big truck. Ohhhh the looks I got at THOSE red lights. Especially while dancing to the Elvis and BeeGee's remastered cd's I bought. I didn't take pictures in Texas even though I always had the camera.

I embarrassed best friend at the Houston Natural Museum when looking at the Russian Zaar's jewels. If the sign said "unknown owner" I'd scream it was mine and demand they give me back my 8,000 carat necklaces, and tiaras back. I was the unknown owner and they didn't believe me!!!!


So I rung in the new year with awesome friends. No resolutions for me.... I just want to be a better person every day. Every day should also entail something extremely silly and fun. Do you think I really care if people in the car next to me see me dancing and singing at red lights? No.

January and February are SO boring. Everything is brown and dead and gross. So I have been on a journey to make it more enjoyable. Therefor I am making up excuses to have parties.

Elvis Presley would have been 75 on January 8th. We had a party for him. I made my mother go buy a cake at Publix. It was chocolate with chocolate fudge icing and pink roses. Yes, it DID say "Happy Birthday Elvis." I called everyone I knew and we had a party. Some poor people who had never met me or my family showed up. Hey, free food yah know. So after dinner when I dimmed the lights and put the candles on the cake a guy said "Are we REALLY going to sing Happy Birthday to Elvis????" My cousin with a defensive smart mouth defended me and Elvis. She said "YES WE ARE!!! AND we sang Happy Birthday to Jesus with cake too on Christmas OKAY???"
So just picture me holding my big "Life" edition of Elvis up and singing to him and letting him (me) blow out the candles. My hubby bought a present.... Elvis movies on DVD. Since Elvis wasnt here in person and it was MY party I got the present.

Since then we play our new Wii and have everyone over and they all kick my hiney at bowling. Even my mother is better than me. We stay up late three or four nights a week with everyone over. They send the husband out at 11 pm for dessert and ice cream and we act silly and last night mom and I sat at the table laughing until I cried all my makeup off.

Im the type of person who always has to have something to look forward to. So the end of February thru the first of March off to Texas I shall run again. Who says you can't go home? (which is the song thats playing right now!! Me and Mom believe in "sign songs." The Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo will be kicking off with a BBQ cookoff. I went last year and was the life of the party. I'm expected to be there. I am kind of a big deal. That does not mean I will have time or the desire to speak to everyone there though. I shall be very busy I'll have plenty of other things to do to keep mom and best friend and her hubby entertained. Somebody's gotta make everyone laugh!

In the meantime I will be in the salon being THE Stylist to the Stars. Its my true love and never boring. I have made some of the greatest friends at the salon. My days are social events... my nights have to be perfectly arranged to spread the love between my husband, family and friends.

This brings me to Dixie. She is my best friend in the whole wide world. Sorry everyone. None of you follow me room to room, hug and kiss me FIVE GAZILLION times a day. Bark at neighbors when we're outside, and stand in front of me so little old ladys walking white fluffy dogs don't attack me. Husband may hold me or keep his hand on my back all night, and bring me cookies when my blood sugar drops, or walk me to the potty at 3 am when Im wondering around the house sleepwalking looking for a bathroom.... but Dixie doesn't leave my side unless she's sleepy like now. She sstrategically has moved MY pillow and MY blanket on the couch so she is covered up with her head on the pillow like her mommy lays. So right now she needs me to come lay down and watch Ugly Betty and The Kardashians. (yes I love the Kardashians. So make fun of me) Today is restful Monday day. Dixie and Mommy day. So I must run before I get in trouble.

Maybe I'll post SOME pictures of Facebook later.... If I can be bothered.

I overheard an interesting conversation this morning. Now mind you, that happens frequently in the hair salon and spa world, but this one hit home.

A man, albeit a little quirky, (but hey so am I!) was lecturing someone about positive and negative electrical charges. There was a lot of science, according to him, about how this all works, and that pretty much went in one of my ears and out the other. My quirky little brain perked up, when he started speaking about the pluses and minuses and the way we crave them.
According to this theory this is why people vacation at the beach, or in the mountains. Your heart and soul crave positive and negative charges. I think he said if you live in a valley you yearn to climb to the mountain tops every so often.

Some EXTREMELY unbalanced people long for the desert, but I'm not one of those. Yay! Guess Im not as weird as I thought. But hey, if YOU like the desert more power to you. I prefer desssert, like chocolate cake but whatever. The color green around me is also much more pleasant than brown, unless its of course, that chocolate cake. But I prefer to eat dessert amongst greenery, no dessert in the desert.

As of this morning, I relinquished myself to the fact that IT IS OKAY that I have to get to Texas and see the water. The positive and negative ions in the world are battling with me! No it is not pretty water, but its where I grew up. Its where I have a gazillion memories, and where I learned lessons and grew into who I am now. Its where I hoped and dreamed and learned how to be the stylist to the stars! Now that I don't live there, I don't have any problems there, like if I'm going to pass my Geometry test. In fact I can drive by the high school and scream vulgar things out the window because there are poor children in there suffering AND IM NOT!!!!! WOO HOOOO!!!!

So I can go South and West on Southwest Airlines to Texas, and have a ball. Sleep when I want. Play when I want. Soak the saltwater into my lungs and let it frizz my hair. I can laugh hysterically with all my friends, and relax and have lots of coffee with my daddy.

I am going to fly off of this landlocked piece of earth I'm on and forget the past couple of years of stress and take a vacation. Like in my favorite movie, "What About Bob?" "A vacation from my problems!!!!"
No actually I'm going because Galveston water has the electricity I need.

This weekend I get to go to the Great Smoky Mountains, and I know those little microscopic bubbles affect a person differently. So I'll have mountains, then be back down on the land for a while, and then off to the water.

Maybe for a few months I'll be more balanced. I love sitting in my pajamas all day on my day off, drinking pots of coffee and trying to be as witty as Barbara Jean on the Reba show by watching episode after episode, but how can I become famous if I don't get fab-i-fied and my energy balanced? I also strive to be Lorelai Gilmore, which I've only told two other people that. I just can't stretch myself to be as tall as either one of these actresses! Maybe I have a height complex...? Maybe I need funny screenwriters to write my life.

So y'all will find me on mountain tops and you'll find me in the ocean in October. You'll find me one year older. You'll be so stinkin' jealous of how happy I've learned to force myself to be, you'll be begging to know the secret. Soon as I figure it out, I'll share it for $5,000 grand a pop. Anyone know how to mass produce dvd's? Wait I hate the way I look.... lessons on cd will be better.....

I'll warn y'all now. This may be a hurried, rough draft, rambling blog. Don't judge my writing skills, and the notion that my book will never get published if this is the way I write. People DO get editors for a reason. I'm hoping my boss's momma will be my editor and my cover artist, but thats another subject.

I have lots of things to hurry up and say!

First today is the day, that women were given the legal right to vote. YAY! Have I ever voted? No. Ya know why? Im too busy just being a happy person, and taking care of everyone to listen to politics. I should be proud to vote but I don't do it. You can be mad if you want. I'm probably not going to start either. For those of you, especially y'all girls, YOU GO!

Secondly, HAPPY NATIONAL DOG DAY!!!!!!!!!!! Hug your doggies!! I already had caffeine/cuddle time with my Dixie this morning. We do that every day. Get up, get coffee, get the blanket and watch the Weather Channel. She hugs me and cuddles with me. I always wanted a BIG BLACK LAB, and now I got one.... with a lot of her German Shepherd Momma in her. Its cool though, it makes her the best dog.... except this hiding under the bed chewing thing. I am so sore I can barely move from spending 45 minutes digging under the bed last night. Apparently it is fun to take socks and books and put them under the bed and chew them up.
Human flesh and fat can be smashed and shoved under a bed, but when my ribs got bruised from hitting metal I got mad. Dixie and I talked this morning though and she tried to understand English... but she's German.....

Speaking of Germany... one of my clients just got back from Russia!!!!! Yes I know. Two separate countries.
They ARE on the other side of the world though, so they have that in common. Anyhow, I got a HUGE gourmet chocolate bar from Russia! It is so prettily wrapped I think I may save the wrapper forever and ever. Amen. They sure write funny in Russia.... the "n"s are backwards. How does THAT makes any sense? "Oh lets just be different and turn letters backwards, and if little American children who are dyslexic and are being treated see it they will be SUPER DUPER confused!" How do you say Super Duper in Russian?

I'll tell you whats super duper. I feel loved by my clients! Mostly they are wayyyyy more than people that see me to get their hair beautified. A lot of them turn into dear, wonderful friends. I learn so much from them and have the most wonderful, deep conversations. Sometimes, we just get a good belly laugh that releases those "happy" endorphins and takes some stress away. The kind of laughs where I have to put my shears down or someone *me* will probably loose a finger.
In the past few weeks, I have gotten gifts galore. Its not so much the gift its the thought behind it. Someone is thinking about ME!!! Little ol' me!!!! I got the prettiest, brightest flowers and enjoyed them every day for almost two weeks! I smiled every time I saw them. I received an autographed book from one of my favorite authors!! Now that is better than an autograph from any movie star to me. I am way more super duper impressed if you write a book. I got the most beautiful wedding invitation today from a sweet "woman" I got to watch grow up. I could go on and on, but what I do all day, is much more than hair. It is me, being a life/hair coach... and the people I see everyday lifting me up, making me laugh, sharing their life through conversation. I would have never known how hard it is to use the potty when its just a hole in the floor, if I didn't come to work today.

So when life is surrounding me, air conditioners break down, cars break down, I worry myself sick about my Solider at war, worry about all of my girls, my parents, my family, my DOG CHEWING UP MY THINGS, at least there are breaks in the day that get me through, and make me a better person.

Evolution not Change

The whole world, your life, my life, plant life, is evolving. It is constant evolution, and I choose that term instead of the word "change." We "change" our clothes, or our hair, but our lives "evolve."
Im sure you can name numerous subjects you are battling or working through right now. You may have the economic pinch, a home repair issue, a job thats taking you no where, bad relationships with family or friends, or CHILDREN.
Recently I've become a mother figure. I gained a wonderful teenager that I watched turn into an adult. I worry every day I didn't do my job well enough, teach her enough, help her enough, guide her enough, pray for her enough. Turning back the clock and having a re-do is not an option now. So I am having to watch her evolve into an adult. I see the child she still is and I see the adult trying to emerge. I see life altering matters, that I have no control over. I have to relinquish the urges to help too much, because who at 18 wants help from someone older than them?
The child who turned into an adult is evolving in ways that we all go through. Then I look at myself and realize I am constantly evolving. Aren't we all? I have to adjust to not having a child to parent, because when I became a full time parent I dove in, took it very seriously, while trying to be fun. I gave it my all, my heart and soul and now after two short years, I have to stop. I have an empty room in my house and I will have to rely on myself for girl items. No more yelling for help when I need green eyeshadow, or help with my bra.
I am also a bonafide step-mom. I have two WONDERFUL stepkids, one who is still a teenage girl and 16. I wish I was with her more and could help her more but she is far away. I love her like she is my own, but feel so far from her. My stepson is 21 and off at War, in Iraq. I mother them, but from a distance because ALL THREE of my kids still have mothers. Great mothers. I am the stepmom, the one who hopefully is young and fun, and they can tell anything to. I had to evolve after I spent a year with my stepson constantly leaving the army base and coming to our home.... and his sister and mom visiting.
I've had a house full of people for two years now, and loved MOST every minute, now its empty and time to evolve.

I made the decision to take this empty nest time to find the new me. To still be there for all of my kids, plus the extra kids who are family or friends and I call my "extra kids." I am a text message away, because who talks on the phone anymore? HAHA! Im choosing to recharge, refresh, meditate, read, write, and evolve, in my ever changing life.

How is your life evolving? What can you do to make your life happy and positive? There is no point whatsoever to live in misery. Sometimes we feel stuck, but there is ALWAYS a way out and way to evolve. I choose to let go of any growing pains and create new-ness. We can all do that with strength and faith. Choose to see what is evolving and choose to evolve with the ebb and flow.



DEFINITIONS:

Evolve-

A gradual process in which something changes into a different and usually more complex or better form.

The process of developing.

Gradual development.

Development, as in social or economic structure or institutions.
























A gradual process in which something changes into a different and usually more complex or better form.
The process of developing.
b. Gradual development.

development, as in social or economic structure or institutions.

Y'all

*From Jamie Renee*
I have wanted to write how I feel about the word y'all, for a while. Recently my face turned BLOOD RED with embarrassment (which by the way look for the hidden word in that word) when I was on the phone paying a bill and I said the term "you guys" only to find out my nice person who was taking my payment was a TEXAN!!!!!! I have been in Tennessee too long where too many Northerners have migrated and have actually been sucked into using "you guys" instead of "y'all." The more I think about it, the more it makes sense that y'all is a much more appropriate word and after you PLEASE READ the following article from below you will see EXACTLY what I mean.


**********************************************************

During a recent trip to Seattle, I found myself in the company of students representing schools and hometowns from around the country. Naturally, everyone talked a little differently and-afraid of being stereotyped-I became more careful about my own speech.

No "fixin'," no "gonna," no "ain't" and above all, no "y'all."

Apparently, these words scream "Southern" and "Mississippi" to the world. That's not a problem in and of itself. However, many people think of Mississippians as ignorant and backward.

This leads to wonderful questions that show who really is ignorant, like, "Do you wear shoes?" (No, I bleached my feet and tattooed swooshes on them.)

Or, "Do you ride horses to school?" (Sure do. In fact, I was walking behind one just yesterday and I wasn't looking. That's why the soles of my tattooed feet are so dark.)

Fortunately, nobody at the junket committed such a faux pas. Still, I didn't want to take any chances.

"Fixin'," "ain't" and "gonna" vanished with no problem. With a little conscious thought, "fixin'" and "gonna" became "about" and "about to."

I should not have worried about "ain't." I didn't use it, but the guy from Massachusetts did. Apparently, "ain't" is a regionalism that has grown into a "nationalism."

"Y'all" caused problems.

There I was, sitting in a room full of journalism majors trying not to fulfill the backward Southern stereotype (Y'all is not blessed by journalism's godhead, the AP stylebook). I raised my hand and was recognized for a question.

Against my intentions, my subconscious chose the best word to address my audience. It is not the proper "you," nor is it "you guys" or even "you all." It is "y'all." Defeated by my subconscious, I gave up and use "y'all" throughout the weekend.

Why was I so compelled to use "y'all?" It clearly was not pride. I purged "fixin'" and "gonna" easily enough. On the way back to the airport, I found the answer.

"Y'all" is simply the best word for the plural second person.

English books insist on using "you" for both singular and plural. Naturally, this often leads to confusion.

No other English pronouns suffer from the problem. Clearly, a distinct word is needed for second person plural. Candidates abound, but most have their weaknesses.

Some might say "you guys" is the word for the job. They're obviously scum of the earth sexist pigs obsessed with their own manliness. Or they may just be from Iowa.

Either way, somebody is going to complain about how "you guys" is unfair and try to change it to "you girl/guys," "you persons" or "you beings who may or may not be either male or female, but of indeterminate sex and/or gender." I'd rather just avoid the whole thing.

"You people" has some promise. Sadly, it already has a purpose. It's used to address groups of people who are collectively irritating, incapable or incompetent.

To me, it has about the same ring as "damn, dirty apes" did to Charlton Heston's hairy friends. Being addressed as "you people" makes me feel like a telemarketer.

"You all" is not much different from "y'all." It sounds similar, but it has two syllables, partly defeating the purpose of using a pronoun-laziness.

It also makes moving more difficult. Say, "I'd like you all to help me move tomorrow." Everyone will agree, not show up and lie the next day, "Oh, I thought you said 'U-haul.'"

So "y'all" is the perfect word for second person plural. I will never again be ashamed to use this most excellent word.

It is clear, concise, gender-free and it forces friends to help move the 50-gallon fish tank that looks perfect between the Anna Kournikova poster and the stop sign.

Using "y'all" improves the English language.

There is one more thing. The progressive may wish to use "y'all" not just in speech but in writing. "Y'all" is spelled with the apostrophe between the y and the a.

Spell it any other way and it's backward and ignorant.



http://media.www.reflector-online.com/media/storage/paper938/news/2003/10/28/Opinion/No.Substitutes.For.Word.yall-2537484.shtml
Nathan Alday is a senior aersopace engineering major. He can be reached at nca1@msstate.edu.